You are very self-sufficient and methodical. You presume to know where you are going but need to find a person who will recognize the way you are, not be too demanding and who is, as they say in Italy, 'Simpatico'.
You give the impression that you are a self-sufficient individual, pretending that you are stoical - indifferent to pain or pleasure. But this is not so, for in truth you are an extremely emotional person, one that may make hasty decisions and perhaps repent at leisure. It is time now perhaps to break the bond of detachment and become the real 'you' - the you that you would like to be.
Having experienced considerable disappointment of late and not knowing quite what to do about it this has led you to suffer a great deal of agitation and anxiety. You are trying very hard to make favourable impressions all round. You feel that you have a right to do anything that you wish without being condemned for your beliefs. Everything seems to be going against you and you feel helpless to change the situation. The possibility of failure is most upsetting and this situation is leading to untold stress. You honestly believe that the situation is not of your making - it is not your fault - you have been misled and abused by those that you trusted, but you are trying to look at the situation quite dispassionately. Would you perhaps not agree that this situation could be regarded as unrealistic self justification?
Recent disappointment has led you to become truly introverted. You are becoming suspicious of everybody and consequently you now feel that you are unable to trust anybody. Unfortunately it would appear that you are curbing your natural enthusiasm and imaginative nature - perhaps this is because you are fearful that you may become over enthused and find that you could possibly be carried away by wishful thinking. You are keeping your distance to see whether attitudes towards you are sincere - but this watchfulness could easily develop into suspicion and distrust.
You are completely worn out - physically and mentally - and it has got to the stage where 'you don't want to participate anymore'. You are in fact experiencing what is known as 'burnout' and your reaction is such that you feel that everyone is against you yet you still seem to refuse to listen to reason. You are hostile, bitter and indignant. You insist that you want and are entitled to your own way - well maybe you are, but your attitude is not conducive to making friends. Take it easy. Let go and get back into the World.
hmmm, quite true sia. haha.